Well that was unexpected!

I had my pre-op appointment on Thursday.  Everything went fine, it was very uneventful.

Friday however was something I hope I never have to experience again, but with the way things are lately I doubt this will be the last time.  I had a Friday morning meeting….the news was not good.  They eliminated the seven lead hand positions.  I hadn't quite lost my job, but I had definitely lost my position.  It felt like I got kicked in the guts.  It still does. They are "stream lining".  Kim will now be responsible for Kingston and Belleville and she will do my duties and her own.
I thought I was good at my job.  Apparently I was mistaken. Or that's how I feel.  Now I have to decide if I want to continue working there back out on a desk or if I want to take a buy out.  I'm afraid to go back on the desk.  I'm afraid I won't be able to meet the target numbers.  I see how the reps struggle, I will struggle.  I'm afraid it's only a matter of time before they phase me out. My pride is also hurt, how do I look my co-workers in the face.  Knowing that I failed.  Also I'm bitter.  So what if I can't put the hard feelings aside and all I do is go in there and "push back".  I have 6 more days to decide.  Hmmmm…maybe my fairy godmother will come and *poof* get me a new job quick as can be.